It’s time now for another collection of IFRS-related tweets (as I still call postings on Elon Musk’s lamentably rebranded “X”), presented here in their original form with all misspellings, oddities and possible obscenities intact. First of all, an intriguing addition in our long-running series of instances of IFRS being used as an acronym for something else:

• The INTERPOL Facial Recognition System. The INTERPOL Facial Recognition System (IFRS) was launched at the end of 2016 and is populated with facial images received from the majority of our member countries, making it a unique global criminal database.

For partial context, that information was applied to a photo captioned: “Israeli soldier shared a selfie picture while in a Palestinian school in Gaza after turning it into a military operation center.” Moving rapidly on to safer territory, someone posted (for no specified reason) a juxtaposition of her IFRS 9 studies and her new dress:

Whatever helps you get by…

Someone said “accounting kids have no business dating each other,” to which a response was: “Truth in this, I’d rather mop the ocean than be with one of the Ifrs gang.” Continuing on the broad theme of conflating IFRS with romance, someone opined: “Something a lot of men don’t like to admit: All of your hobbies and ambitions are to attract women. Nature doesn’t care how much personal fulfillment you get from them. Those things are cool, but they’re a coincidental positive externality to the prime objective: To keep the species going.” To which a barbed response was: “When I go out I have to be careful not to jump on my soapbox about the insanity of IFRS 16 lest I am swamped by insatiable maidens.”

Along related lines, someone else said: “One of my biggest fear is being in a relationship with a man who doesn’t see me as a woman but their equal. I don’t think I’ll recover from that. May God protect me from the possibility of it.” To which a response was: “I think I know what she means. But seeing this in the week, where I stood valiantly and prevailed on an issue so big that most corporate men would’ve folded and cowered is interesting. I stood on my stilettos firmly on my ethics, IFRS, ISA, Income Tax principles.”

The following image was titled: “IFRS and US Gaap if they were women respectively”:

Is IFRS inherently somehow “blonder” than US GAAP? Is IFRS, or its average practitioner, more likely to be encountered knocking back wine. Or is that US GAAP already emptied the glass and is perpetually waiting for the waiter to come back? All very intriguing. At least neither seems too scared of the camera.

Another X user (perhaps a blonde?) opined: “US GAAP is the biggest load of bullshit I’ve ever had to deal with. Not that IFRS is much better but at least there is some sense to IFRS.” And now some assorted others:

• One task I’d love AI to take over is the IFRS checklist. Yes, please, you can do those for me. The rest I can handle.
• I would rather read and understand the IFRS for Investment Funds tonight than process this emotion.
• I have a broken brain. I tried counting sheep to fall asleep and I thought I guess I must have a lot of sheep. How would I recognise them? Is it IFRS 41, biological assets? If I make more sheep I can increase my assets. How can I increase my profit. What supplements would cause wool to grow the fastest. Can I automate sheering? Should I make the fence hirer so they stop jumping over the fence or get injured? Should I take out a loan to get more sheep?
• If IFRS for SME’s has a million haters, I am one of them. If IFRS for SME’s has ten haters, I am one of them. If IFRS for SME’s has no haters, that means I am no longer on this earth. If the world is for IFRS for SME’s, I am against the world.
• i feel a sense of despair whenever i realize the extent to which humanity is penetrated by accounting rules and rules written by similar, neutered, standardized minds – whether progress is possible under the rooftop of us gaap ifrs fasb iasb the united nations, and the basel families. there is zero evidence that humans are ‘better’ or have ever been better off than dinosaurs. dinosaurs might have been dumber and looked unfortunately ridiculous; nevertheless, the agency and autonomy of dinosaurs were never once restricted by the accountants and corporate treasuries and their if ever sensible arbitration.

(And this is me) Don’t you feel the genuine despair underlying some of those contributions? Anyway, that’s it for this time. I’m off to further ponder the blonde, wine-swigging nature of IFRS. Have fun out there!