Reports suggest that Twitter is struggling with its strategic direction. Based on my IFRS-related research on there, as I previously summarized here, that’s no surprise: it’s almost invariably a waste of time. I’m not saying you don’t learn anything. For example, I wouldn’t have known that IFRS (or more precisely “IFRs”) is also used as the acronym for integral fast reactors – nuclear power stations capable of running on material left behind by old nuclear plants (apparently conventional nuclear power uses only 0.6% of the energy contained in the inputted uranium, but IFRs can use almost all the rest). Because I didn’t know this, when I ran across a statement like “We can’t wish the waste away. Either it is stored and then buried. Or it is turned into mox fuels. Or it is used to power IFRs”…I initially thought to myself, well, even if you’re not an advocate, it’s a bit extreme to say IFRS is powered by radioactive waste

But some of the authors of what follows might even disagree with me on that. As an important public service and holiday treat, I present now a further batch of recent tweets that mention IFRS in some form, presented here in their original uncensored, unaltered form – typos, obscenities (I’ve given up on trying to get kids to read this blog) and all. So here we go:

I want a boyfriend in first year he should be younger, look younger because that IFRS text book won’t hold itself ”

How does IFRS 15 affect my boyfriend’s business? How will they now recognise revenue? Does this mean he will stop taking me out??

If it has nothing to do with #IFRS , I don’t even want to hear about it.

Who is actually done with IFRS 9 ?. EVEN THE DICTIONARY HAS LESS PAGES THAN IFRS 9 !!!

My mom just came upstairs and told me to stop cursing. I told her to tell IFRS to stop being such a douchebag.

Einsteins space-time theory is too confusing. I’ll leave this to the mice in white coats. *grabs IFRS instead*

The moment management ask to get familiarize with ifrs..u should know that your life is 50% screwed like standing at the end of a cliff.die!

That’s graaaaand. I’ll buzzin me tits on Red Bull tryna wrap me head around IFRS 10 while crying into the dog’s water bowl.

5am Int. acct. study time at Starbucks. Only here and now can reading about IFRS rise from IASC’s ashes seem epic. #jazzstandards

And yes, I freely confess that I use old IFRS manuals as doorstops. As well the FRC book on auditing standards.

You read the whole IFRS standard like “a whole standard for THIS??” and then you grunt.

Small thing in this office, according to IFRS, what does IAS say about it? Am like, can IFRS and IAS kindly shut the fuck up?

Just evacuated a hotel for a fire alarm with my IFRS books and revision notes…. Did however forget my room key #accounting4lyf #FalseAlarm

OUR ACCOUNTING LECTURER LITERALLY JUST ENDED AN EMAIL BY SAYING “MAY THE GOD OF IFRS AND FINANCIAL STATEMENTS BE WITH YOU” LMAO

I don’t know what’s wrong with America, they don’t want IFRS, they don’t want cricket.

How these pppl expect me to stay awake..he’s speaks IFRS Standards..but it sounds like #Roc a my babi on the tree

Playing Scrabble with little kids is awesome because you can use words like “ahate” or “ifrs” and they don’t know any better.

so but like if I can tolerate another year of this sous-cheffing bull-shittery I can sit my motherfucking CPA starting 01/16 w/ IFRS 15

How to turn on a CA lady as a client? At one go. “Ma’am the bank reco” – Wow “Sale invoice records” -Aaaah “IFRS Financials” – Oh my God Aah

You know you need help when you start dreaming about IFRS changing its standards. Can’t I dream about my boyfriend? 😦 #uLife

Today, my colleague enlightened me about IFRS. I reciprocated by explaining the modern generational phenomena called the ‘dadbod’.

Carrying around IFRS books as well as everything else has well and truly mangled my back

They’ll never find Jay Sean’s tears in the ocean. They’ll never find my tears in this IFRS. Oh wait, it’s smudging the ink…

For many centuries people of many culture, time, and religion regarded 6 as the devil’s number and badluck, then IFRS 9 was released.

IFRS books are like Bibles to me. The standards themselves are the chapters and verses.

this IFRS quiz is annoying snd dumb i haven’t even read the book how do you expect me to do this quiz

The only time IFRS comes in handy – IFRS 1 spider 0 #deathbyaccounting

The people who wrote/write IFRS are absolute geniuses, the people who wrote/write the Income Tax on the other hand need love.

(and this is me) Well, I think that sums it up for all of us. I’m off now, as suggested, to try and find IFRS and deliver that message about not being such a douchebag. Hope it works! Happy holidays!

The opinions expressed are solely those of the author