For the last few years, I’ve had an account on Twitter, the social media service which restricts posts (or “tweets”) to 140 characters at a time (I scooped up the prime “IFRSCanada” label). I don’t put anything on there except links to the articles on this blog, but periodically I look through everything on Twitter (I mean, everything in the world) containing a reference to IFRS. You might think this would take hours, but actually it seldom takes more than a few minutes.

It’s not even a very varied few minutes, since there tends to be a lot of repetition. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Twitter, over time you build up a group of followers (those who receive your tweets automatically) and those you follow (whose tweets you receive): typically some people will be in both groups. If you particularly like a posting from someone you follow, you can send it on (or “retweet” it) to your own followers. This is how a hot item spreads across the Twitter universe. Obviously the retweet volumes for IFRS content pale against those for, say, an update on the latest disastrous celebrity plastic surgery, but it still happens that if you learn once about something the SEC Chief Accountant said in a speech, then you’ll learn about it twenty times.

Since Twitter is a truly global platform, I have to skip in my research over numerous foreign language tweets, although I always feel I’m missing out on the good stuff there. There’s much else of purely local interest and a regular stream of job ads, some of which might tempt you to change your life (Group IFRS Specialist: Cork, Technical Accountant – Group Cork – FTC €48,000 – €63,000 ). That aside, it’s pretty thin pickings: the occasional link to an article or report I might have missed otherwise, an occasional biting comment about the perceived follies of the IASB. And – and this is the real payoff, if any – the odd (how to put it…?) personal expression of what IFRS means to the tweeter. As an important public service, I’m going to present a selection of these here now, in their original uncensored, unaltered form (typos, obscenities and all), and I think we’ll all agree that in combination, they approach a kind of mystical profundity. So here we go:

If accounting is Angband, then Luca Pacioli is Melkor; GAAP is Sauron; IFRS and IAS are the dragons; my prof. is a Balrog and I am an orc.

The weather in cape town is beautiful today! May the IFRS, the ISA and the Tax act also be beautiful in Jesus Christ’s Name, Amen!

Someone should buy me IFRS red book 2014 please.. It’s only £68. Show some love

Can someone get me a Starbucks, a duffin, and a life away from these IFRS books? Oh, and book me a holiday?! Ta very much

Under IFRS Suicide Bombs are expensed in the period they’re detonated. But under GAAP they’re capitalized and expensed over time.

When you see the Scion F-RS car commercial and have to do a double take because you thought you heard IFRS #accountingproblems

Who says that accounting doesnt relate to english? Now suck that words sir. IFRS eats your high. Just dont underestimate what I have choosen

New IFRS are like new Bible verses for me.

IF U HATE ON DIFFERENCES BETWN GAAP & IFRS ACCTNG STANDARDS AND JUST WANT SOME MUFUCKIN CONSISTENCY UP IN HERE I SEE U

Let me get back to my book… so happy to be reading a non-academic book for a change. IFRS won’t be happy about this, my jealous lover :’)

IFRS implementation seems distant and improbable. But I’ll tell you what’s really improbable: Arsenal losing to Tottenham!

Read your article. It is simply head-spinning. IASB or IFRS — they remind me of John Girsham’s THE FIRM

Which is harder to understand? IFRS, IAS or a woman?

well to balance that out i will get drunk, trashy and sparkley watch Eurovision while complaining about IFRS‘s

Every time I have to CR an expense account under IFRS my soul FIGURATIVELY DIES A LITTLE. So. Much. Hatred.

When a problem clearly says “Gray” but the guy giving the lecture continuously reads it as “Gary” and also says IFRS as “eye-fers” …

I shall brush up my guitar skills, and I will sing out all the IAS and IFRS. Post YouTube. Eh not bad ma this idea?

I’m so confused with IAS and IFRS shit now

Thin out amplify up-to-date the wearing apparel shirts towards say goodbye to the onlookers spite of green with jealousy eyes: Ifrs

I saw one fine bitch today mahn i forgot the IFRS i was cramming.”

You know you’re an accounting major when your phone autocorrects gifts to ifrs

Almost spilled coffee on my IFRS. My life flashed before my eyes just then.

My bank account lacks Going concern, might as well treat it on liquidation basis..IFRS matters”hahaha

(and this is me again)….and you know, after all of that, I actually do feel I learned something. Just don’t ask me to articulate what it is. Anyway, I’m off to get drunk, trashy and sparkley. Happy New Year!

The opinions expressed, on this occasion, are not necessarily those of the author